Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
God has blessed me in so many exciting, new ways this summer! However, life has also rocked me to my foundation! As I struggle yet again, God has sent people to envelope me in their arms and get me through. The courage to change (and accept change), the strength to get out of bed each morning and put one foot in front of the other, greeting life and choosing to embrace change comes to me from God.
Those of you who are within my immediate cirle of family and friends know that my 4 biological children and 3 stepdaughters are my purpose for being. I believe God began preparing me to be their mother/step-mother the day I was born. God, my parents, grandparents, family, teachers, and friends each taught me about how to care. I am the mother I am because of them- good, bad, or otherwise. Being responsible for another life(lives)- nurturing, loving, and giving thanks to God, means that you must be willing to give that life(lives) back to God.
My oldest son chose, at the age of 15, to disown me when his dad and I divorced. He will not speak to me and will not answer phone calls, texts, emails, Fb requests, or be in the same physical location I am in. However, I am still his mother and he is my child. I pray for him daily and know that deep down, he knows God and God has great plans for his life! Though this is a deep wound in my heart/head/soul and difficult for me to think about or discuss, I have had to "let go and let God" in order to survive. I can not control the situation and I had 15 wonderful years raising him. I know the bond we had at his birth and try to focus on the memories of his formative, early childhood years when we spent every moment together- reading, singing, dancing, laughing, fingerpainting, building towers, designing elaborate lego creations, etc. He is Our Father's son and my charge as his mother was to give him back to God, lead him to God, and live my life by example- never trying to be the "perfect" person/mother because I can't go 30 minutes without making a mistake :) but trying to follow God's will in my life- asking for forgiveness and sharing God's love with others.
Why am I choosing to blog about this? My son is now 22 and I am happy to say that he is a college graduate, gainfully employed as an engineer, and engaged to be married. I am sharing because I am so proud to be his mother and want others who may be struggling with similar issues to know they are never alone!!
As the minister at New Springs Church in Wichita shared this morning, some of the wounds from life are critical blows to the head- rocking our world. That is why we have to begin each day choosing to wear the helmet of Christ's salvation. Salvation is our gift from God- through his Son, Jesus Christ, AND is also our promise the God will save us from eternal death if we accept the gift of salvation. When we choose to wear the helmet of salvation, God will protect us through life's blows- those times when we face critical medical diagnoses, when we are rejected by loved ones, when we get that midnight phone from/about someone we love, etc.
Life will deal out critical blows. June 13th, the judge chose to grant primary residential custody of my youngest son to his father. She felt like even though he has always lived with me, wanted to move with me to South Carolina, and he personally told her so in chambers- her charge was to look out for his best interests. She did not want him to have to change schools and also did not want him traveling once a month. Though this has been one of those critical blows, I have to trust that God has a hand in the judge's decision. I am stepping out on faith- knowing that there was a reason Tony got the job at Boeing in SC, our home in Kansas sold in 3 weeks, and I quickly found a P/T job writing curriculum and teaching in SC which will enable me to travel back to Kansas 5 days each month to be with Gavin. I don't know the reasons why I am facing this new challenge in life- but perhaps the school move truly would not have been the best for Gavin. I'm struggling considerably but I do have to trust that God has everything under control.
Thank you God for all the people you have sent to support me- you know who you are and there are too many of you to name. Some of you have spoken to me personally, some have texted, called, Facebooked me, and many of you have prayed! Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers and we will do the same for you and your family :)
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Monday, July 4, 2011
My yoke is easy and My burden is light
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
I believe that God speaks to me through other people. And the times that I want to hide out are probably the times I need to reach out.
I met Father Andy this morning.
He greeted Gavin as we walked down the sidewalk to enter the church and I knew without a doubt that this moment was a God "thing". Gavin and I have been searching for a church to attend in Charleston and it has been quite an adventure (more about that later). Fr. Andy spoke directly to Gavin, allowing me to just listen. I heard God's voice. He wanted to know who Gavin was, where he was from, and wanted him to know he was welcome at St. Thomas. Fr. Andy is a teacher. He knows the power of greeting people as they enter his classroom.
Fr. Andy's homily was based on the following verses:
Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Fr. Andy is a teacher and came out into the congregation to interact with us. He told stories about his travels, connecting the vocabulary words in the verse in a "text to life" context. While explaining "yoke" he said that God has custom designed our yoke just to fit us. I had never thought of this in that way. My yoke was designed just for me.
He further explained that while sometimes bad things happen to us- that is because God gives people free will. Sometimes we choose not to listen and/or to follow our own will. It is during those times that the yoke becomes heavy. God wrote the "owner's manual" for us and the Bible is that manual.
He concluded his homily by recognizing birthdays and visitors, asking them to stand and speaking directly to them. Out of a congregation of 200, he called Gavin by name and asked him to stand and share. Fr. Andy is a teacher.
I believe that God speaks to me through other people. Today it was Fr. Andy but most often it is through my family and friends. I am reminded that while on my journey, seeking courage to change, I need to be still and listen as God speaks through others.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
I believe that God speaks to me through other people. And the times that I want to hide out are probably the times I need to reach out.
I met Father Andy this morning.
He greeted Gavin as we walked down the sidewalk to enter the church and I knew without a doubt that this moment was a God "thing". Gavin and I have been searching for a church to attend in Charleston and it has been quite an adventure (more about that later). Fr. Andy spoke directly to Gavin, allowing me to just listen. I heard God's voice. He wanted to know who Gavin was, where he was from, and wanted him to know he was welcome at St. Thomas. Fr. Andy is a teacher. He knows the power of greeting people as they enter his classroom.
Fr. Andy's homily was based on the following verses:
Matthew 11:28 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Fr. Andy is a teacher and came out into the congregation to interact with us. He told stories about his travels, connecting the vocabulary words in the verse in a "text to life" context. While explaining "yoke" he said that God has custom designed our yoke just to fit us. I had never thought of this in that way. My yoke was designed just for me.
He further explained that while sometimes bad things happen to us- that is because God gives people free will. Sometimes we choose not to listen and/or to follow our own will. It is during those times that the yoke becomes heavy. God wrote the "owner's manual" for us and the Bible is that manual.
He concluded his homily by recognizing birthdays and visitors, asking them to stand and speaking directly to them. Out of a congregation of 200, he called Gavin by name and asked him to stand and share. Fr. Andy is a teacher.
I believe that God speaks to me through other people. Today it was Fr. Andy but most often it is through my family and friends. I am reminded that while on my journey, seeking courage to change, I need to be still and listen as God speaks through others.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.
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